that feeling

it has been a long time i have this kind of feeling
only on her
but now
there is another her ...
that is not love right?
i can't behave like this anymore
anyone can help me?

i hate that feeling
it make me feel so bad...
i just miss you
and ...
i will never fall in love with you
please
i don't want to be like that again
it is very hurt
and we are in the same hostel...
for 2 and a half year 
need to face you almost everyday
please don't
haiz....

this is the reason why i hate myself
i really dunno what is love
and never be in love
what a sad life\

i want to try
but
i dun think there is a chance for me

PLEASE 
tell me that
this is not love...